Tuesday 22 May 2018 by DavyToast

Goths want to wish you a happy World Goth Day, but can’t because, you know, ‘happy’


World Goth Day

Goths worldwide are celebrating enjoying acknowledging World Goth day today.

World Goth Day, during which goths are encouraged suggested to show off their happiness pride in being strange and unusual, has been an annual event since 2009 with festivities events usually taking place during the hours of darkness.

Activities planned for the Day include the 1,500 metre mope, the synchronised sobbing, and a game of Pick The Andrew Eldritch Out Of The Police Lineup.

Goth Simon von Williams told us that he’d been planning to go round wishing people a ‘Happy World Goth Day’, but realised he couldn’t do that whilst maintaining the image so was just going around saying ‘World Goth Day’ instead.

“I’ve made all my friends cards with black sparkles and a really unhappy looking teddy bear holding a black balloon on it, just to really get into the spirit of the thing.

“And I was going to make some cakes, but the tortured ennui of my soul overwhelmed me and I wrote out the lyrics to A Love Like Blood thirty times instead, which amounts to much the same thing really.

“Part of being a goth is remembering that things can always be worse.

“Such as today being Morrissey’s birthday as well – and I may be a miserable bastard, but at least I’m not Morrissey.”

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