Thursday 17 May 2018 by Davywavy

House value falls by £40,000 after neighbour gets his shirt off in the garden


topless man in garden

A man taking advantage of the sunny weather by sitting in the garden with his shirt off has knocked forty grand off the value of his neighbour’s house.

Local Man Simon Williams, 22 (stone), said ‘Sun’s out, guns out’ this morning before displaying his moobs to the world in a move which neighbours described as both hideous and extremely costly.

“We’ve been looking to sell up as we’ve got a kid on the way and we need somewhere a bit bigger,” Simon’s neighbours told us.

“However, when a potential buyer came round after lunch he saw Simon sat on a recliner with a can of Stella and immediately dropped his offer.

“I’m not sure exactly what did it – whether it was the sun gleaming off his pasty white form, or his cheerful cry of ‘Phew, hot isn’t it!’ whilst wiping a mixture of sweat and crumbs off his tummy as they walked through the gate.

“I think it would have helped if he’d been wearing underpants beneath his shorts as well, to be frank.”

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