Tuesday 8 May 2018

Snooker fan dismayed to find no-one in the office wants to talk about the snooker


snooker

Snooker fan Simon Williams has spent most of his first day back at work since the World Championship final struggling to find someone to talk with him about it.

Williams, who has been a snooker fan since his dad bought him a four-foot table that sat on his parent’s dinner table when he was seven, is struggling to understand the reluctance of his colleagues to be as excited about Mark Williams’ victory as he is.

Colleague Sharon Smith told us, “Yeah, snooker is a bit, you know, boring, right? I mean, I love that Simon is passionate about it, but I think we can all agree it should be a hobby, not a sport. Hell, even the editor of NewsThump added this story to their Sports section very reluctantly.”

However, another co-worker did his best to speak like a fellow snooker fan, telling Williams, “Those balls huh, smashing into each other and firing off into the holes at the side of the table. It was very impressive stuff.

“And the tall man with the stick, he was very smart looking, definitely. Poking his stick into the balls like a proper expert.”

Williams himself even offered evidence of his namesake and new world champion Mark Williams going naked at a press conference as evidence that snooker is really interesting.

Sharon Smith overheard the conversation, before interjecting, “Wait, there’s a naked sportsman involved, and he’s got a couple of tattoos? Nobody told me that – yes please!”

However, after viewing footage of the press conference, she concluded, “Oh, right, snooker players don’t spend a lot of time in the gym, do they.”

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