Tuesday 3 April 2018

Brexit means paying more for things than you need to, insists De La Rue


businessman de la rue passports

British Passports should be made by an expensive domestic producer now that we’re leaving the EU, according to passport manufacturer De La Rue.

After losing the £490m contract to produce the UK’s new blue passports to a Franc-Dutch firm, De La Rue has called on all patriotic Brits to show to the world that money isn’t everything and that needlessly paying through the nose for things is the British way.

A spokesperson for the passport manufacturer told us, “Everyone knows that leaving the EU is just a smokescreen for the ‘Buy British’ campaign.

“All this gumph about using the WTO trade rules, and doing lucrative deals with other countries was just a ploy to make you vote for Brexit – all along it was the intention that in future everything would made in Britain, and be prohibitively expensive as a result.”

A petition has been signed by 270,000 people demanding the passports be made in the UK by De La Rue, with each signatory literally confirming that they’re happy being hit in the pocket as long as they are out of the EU.

Leave campaigner Simon Williams told us, “It kind of makes a mockery of the all the trouble we went to with the Brexit Bus and the £350m NHS promise to be honest.

“These people are clearly happy paying more for things to leave the EU, it was never about saving money for them.

“Hell, we could have driven around the country with a bus declaring post-Brexit Britain will leave you destitute, and they would still have voted for it.

Brexit means Clusterf*ck – get the t-shirt!

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