Thursday 25 January 2018 by Neil Tollfree

FA insists that there was no better man, out of all the available men, than Phil Neville


Phil Neville

The FA has defended the appointment of Phil Neville as the manager of the women’s national team saying that out of all the men available for the role, he was the best man.

Despite Neville making jokes about violence against women and having little managerial experience, the FA is adamant that they were unable to find any other man suitable for the job, and if they had found a better man, they would have appointed that man instead.

“You must understand that many good football men are involved in normal football and consequently, do not want to get involved with women’s football,” said a representative for the FA as he popped outside the Presidents Club for a cigar.

“We looked at all the men available to manage the women’s team and, aside from a little casual banter about beating up his wife, Phil was, by far, the best man.

“Just the sort of man needed for a position of responsibility like this.”

The representative looked baffled as it was suggested that perhaps the manager of the national women’s team didn’t actually need to be a man.

“What, get some sort of hyper-intelligent monkey to do it, you mean?

“Well, it’s a bold idea, but I don’t think science has advanced that far yet.”

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