Monday 8 January 2018 by Lucas Wilde

Any adult thick enough to want to eat a Tide Pod encouraged to do so


Tide pods detergent

If you’re the sort of grown adult that wants to eat a small tablet of washing powder, then you should just crack on.

That’s the advice of experts this afternoon following reports that the latest “thing” is to want to eat a Tide Pod; a small tablet of laundry detergent designed for cleaning clothes in a washing machine.

“Absolutely, you little scamp, chow down,” confirmed expert, Simon Williams.

“If that’s a genuine desire you have, then you are bringing absolutely nothing to the gene pool and we want you out of it as soon as humanly possible.

“Even if you don’t actually want to and that’s just a meme that you find genuinely funny, I urge you to give it a go.

“You want to eat the Tide Pods, we want you to eat the Tide Pods. It’s win-win. Let me get you a plate.”

Meme enthusiast, Jay Cooper, said, “I’ve eaten six of them now and I’m feeling fucking awful.

“That said, I am absolutely dedicated to my meme culture, so I’m determined to press on. I might have to snort the next one though.”

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