Friday 5 January 2018 by Arabin Patson

Thank you President Trump for all your help with marketing, say publishers of Fire and Fury


The White House Fire and Fury

Henry Holt and Co, the publisher of Michael Wolff’s tell-all story about Trump’s first year in office, has issued a heartfelt Thank You message to the US president.

In a press release, the publishing house elaborated further, explaining, “Selling books is a tough business. It’s very hard to sell one solely on the premise that the current president is an incompetent and divisive pervert with a creepy man-crush on Vladimir Putin.

“It’s like selling a book called Water is Wet. But now we are set to become a bestseller thanks to his legal actions in trying to stop us publishing it. He might not be good at anything else, but when it comes to generating publicity, he’s really is The Donald.”

Simon Williams, non-fiction reviewer for the New York Times, confirmed that Donald Trump’s frantic attacks had virtually guaranteed the book would make a fortune.

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“It’s not like the book had any surprises. Melania sleeps in a separate bed. Think she married him for his dashing good looks and rapier wit? The man himself told us he was a sex pest so that’s old news. And the infighting stories? Hardly shocking when members of staff leave the White house literally every month.

“But the publishers chose a good target. Once you have Trump doing your press, you’re going to make headlines. Lots and lots of lucrative headlines.

“And now it’s in the zeitgeist so I have to plough through the unsurprising revelations that Steve Bannon is an abusive dickhead with delusions of grandeur and Putin treats Trump like an old beaten dog. The wife-fucking thing might be fun though.”

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