Tuesday 2 January 2018 by Mike Ryder

‘New Year, New Me’ revealed as Fake News


new year fake news

As 2017 passes into history as a year that should be remembered as one of the worst in history, but probably won’t because no notable ageing celebrities died towards the end of it, one of the year’s most pathetic trends seems to be hanging on.

Indeed, the alarming populist tendency to just say any old bullshit and hope people are thick enough to believe it appears to have spread to the vast majority of the nation, with many of them using the arrival of 2018 to adopt such batshit crazy claims as ‘New year, new me’ and ‘This is going to be my year’.

Media analyst Simon Williams said, “Its inevitable really, it started with that complete fucking joke of a claim on Boris’ Brexit bus in 2016, and really spiralled in 2017 with pretty much everything that Donald Trump said, tweeted, or even basically thought.

“It’s perfectly reasonable for people to think that they can just say whatever shit they want and it will come true for them.”

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Williams continued, “This really boils down to a ridiculous thought that people have that things will go their way because the Conservatives keep telling them they will. Which, incidentally is the largest and most frequently spouted fake news statement pretty much in all of history.”

Meanwhile, like with all other fake news stories, businesses are finding a way to capitalise on the weak-mindedness of people who believe them by offering discounted gym memberships, magazine subscriptions and holidays that will mostly be spent trying to get through customs.

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