Monday 18 December 2017 by Lucas Wilde

The Apprentice final damages the show’s otherwise impeccable credibility


The Apprentice final with Alan Sugar

*THIS ARTICLE CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE FINAL EPISODE OF THE APPRENTICE WHICH AIRED ON SUNDAY RATHER THAN THE USUAL WEDNESDAY FOR SOME BIZARRE/BLOODY ANNOYING REASON*

The final episode of The Apprentice has brought shame upon the jumped-up game show, according to viewers.

The final episode saw Alan Sugar deciding to invest money into not one but TWO fuckwits this year, rendering the preceding hour of amateurish presentations and bickering even more pointless than is usual.

“It’s a disgrace to the programme,” claimed Barabara Thomas, apparently without irony.

“The goal of The Apprentice isn’t to generate as many viewers as possible, as per every television show that has ever existed, it is to find the next generation of business gurus to take us into the bright post-Brexit future. Everybody knows that.”

“I immediately took to Twitter to voice my displeasure at what basically amounted to a no-contest. That will definitely show the producers. If there’s one thing that reality TV showrunners hate, it’s a controversy that leads to social media traction.”

Another moron, Simon Williams, said, “Alan Sugar has picked a bloke who looks like a sex robot for lonely women, and a woman who looks like she could be one of those lonely women.

“I don’t know what he’s thinking. He keeps picking idiots every year and then thinking we’ll never catch on. Well, we have, and that’s why I’ve been watching every epsiode for the last ten years in order to point that out on Twitter.

“Who’s the smart one now, eh?”

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