Tuesday 12 December 2017

Shock at news that Dr Liam Fox may not be a fox


Liam Fox

There was widespread shock across the political spectrum as evidence emerged that Dr Liam Fox may not actually be a fox.

The evidence cites the lack of a big bushy tail, his bipedal nature, and being largely furless.

Although the document does concede that he may simply have adopted a comprehensive daily shaving regime.

“It does seem rather conclusive,” said a senior member of the Tory Party.

“Frankly, I feel a little foolish for not noticing beforehand, but I think we were all just so excited to have an actual fox in the cabinet that we didn’t really look too closely into his background.”

It is understood that Prime Minister Theresa May specifically appointed Dr Liam Fox to his post of Trade Secretary due to him being a fox and therefore having a natural cunning.

Suspicions about his true nature first rose after a year or so in his post when it became apparent that Dr Fox was actually whatever the opposite of cunning is.

“I’m shocked that he could have deceived us for so long, I worked with him on an almost daily basis,” said a senior cabinet colleague.

“You’d be a bit naive not to expect some duplicity in modern politics, but to claim to be a fox when you’re not, seems beyond the pale if you ask me.”

However, some have noted that people really should have noticed Dr Fox’s true nature earlier.

“It does seem a little odd that no one noticed,” said political commentator Simon Williams

“I mean, if he really were a genuine fox then you’d imagine that a number of his cabinet colleagues would have put on silly hats, mounted horses and used a pack of dogs to chase him across the countryside before brutally tearing him to shreds.

“Its the country way.”

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