Tuesday 12 December 2017 by Lucas Wilde

Britons brave the weather to make it to jobs they despise


britons in jobs they hate

Britain has shown its usual pluck to make it into work on time.

Despite snow, ice and yetis (probably), the hard-working men and women of the United Kingdom donned coats, hats and scarves before setting about the family saloon with an ice scraper to get to their soul-shattering places of employment in good time.

“My journey this morning was literally Lord of the Rings,” said Simon Williams, one of the many hard-working Britons who doesn’t know what “literally” means.

“The car wouldn’t start, so I had to walk to work. I fell over twice, eventually limping into the office with a badly barked shin but an enormous sense of achievement.

“Now comes the truly difficult task of dealing with the pricks in accounting, my bastard of a manager and the ironically rude and unpleasant woman in charge of our HR department.

“Such are the joys of working as a sales executive at Premium Pencil Leads; the number one pencil lead company, our slogan is ‘we put lead in your pencil’. God I hate it here.

“But I made it on time in order to spend eight hours here, and that’s definitely good.”

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