Wednesday 8 November 2017 by Gary Stanton

iPhone X performing badly in hammer stress tests, complain morons


iPhone X smashed

The iPhone X is so poorly made it is unable to withstand a sustained hammer attack without the glass breaking, numerous twats have concluded this morning.

Arseholes with too way too much money are dismayed with the poor reception their phones give after a prolonged hammering either by a hammer or a set of clumsily located arse cheeks.

Social media is rife with photos of iPhone X owners who have attempted to destroy their phones only to be dismayed at their apparent success in doing so.

Apple spokesman Simon Williams said, “Despite the extortionate price tag, iPhone X performance deteriorates significantly the more you smash them with a heavy blunt object.

“Such as a hammer.

“It’s much like the iPhone 7 and every other previous model in that respect.”

iPhone user Steve England said, “iPhone X fails to maintain a 4G signal when I throw it against a wall and then repeatedly stamp on it – and I didn’t pay a thousand pounds for something that breaks when I try to break it.

“If I recall correctly, the iPhone 6S suffered similar issues when I threw it under a passing tube train.

“These are serious design flaws. You’d think Apple would have learnt their lessons by now.

“It’s a disgrace.”

Apple’s Williams added, “The iPhone 11 will be made from graphene, an invincible type of carbon just one atom thick that is the strongest manmade material to date.

“Still, I’m sure some of you will find a way of fucking even that up.

“And then post a photograph of it on Twitter, obviously.”

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