Monday 6 November 2017 by Gary Stanton

Bono’s money revealed to move in mysterious ways


bono paradise papers

The considerable fortune of U2 frontman, Bono Vox, moves in very mysterious ways, it has been confirmed.

Details of Bono’s offshore investments were exposed last night, courtesy of the Paradise Papers, in what can only be more bad news for savers.

Tax evasion expert, Simon Williams, said, “The so-called Paradise Papers reveal Bono took advantage of a Malta-based firm to invest in a Lithuanian shopping centre, but it’s alright, it’s alright, it’s aaaaaaaal-right.

“In fact, it’s perfectly legit.”

However, critics of the singer, whose real name is Paul Hewson, claim he’s been living underground, eating from a can, running away from the taxman.

Williams continued, “In 2012, the shopping centre business was transferred to a company called Nude Estates Ltd in Guernsey.

“It seems Bono and his cash do indeed move in mysterious ways – from one offshore tax haven to another.

“Anybody who’s been to Guernsey will tell you there are no proper road signs, though I’d hate to be accused of signposting a joke.”

Bono added, “You mean to tell me that in Guernsey the streets have no name? I can’t say I’d noticed.”

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