Saturday 4 November 2017 by Neil Tollfree

Osama Bin Laden was a big fan of NewsThump, reveal CIA files


Osama Bin Laden big NewsThump fan

There were raised eyebrows at the news that everyone’s favourite dead terrorist Osama Bin Laden was a fan of British topical ‘humour’ site NewsThump.

The CIA files revealed some of Bin Laden’s hobbies and interests, which include levelling up his warlock (not a euphemism) in World of Warcraft, watching repeats of 70s sitcom Butterflies, and wacky comedy stylings of NewsThump.

As well as an extensive Internet history showing regular visits to the site, an email to his brother-in-law was discovered.

‘Hi Jamal,

Hope you are well. I’m fine in myself but the haemorrhoids are still a trial. Have you seen what Arsene is doing with Fabregas? Shocking. Anyway, check out this wicked NewsThump article about ham-faced infidel David Cameron, it says he has a face like some ham. Very funny.

Death to the west

Ozzy’

However, there are some indications that he was growing tired of the site before he was shot by US forces in his secret commune. At one point commenting on the site under an alias.

“Yawn, yet more stuff about UKIP. You never do stuff about Ed Miliband. Some sort of agenda here.”

Despite this, he continued to submit article ideas under the name ‘Ozzy Chuckle’, though a spokesperson for the website described them all as ‘utterly shit’.

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