Tuesday 17 October 2017

Supermarket refusing to accept sex with Katie Hopkins in exchange for the groceries she wants


Katie Hopkins

After explaining on Twitter that she has exchanged sex in return for things that she wants, Katie Hopkins has been told by her local supermarket that they would prefer the cash.

Hopkins, who was explaining that sex should be considered as a cash equivalent when exchanging it for things you want, has insisted that her sexual favours are more than enough to cover her weekly shop.

Hopkins told reporters, “Look, they’re just groceries, I want them, and I’m offering you a sexual encounter with a former LBC host and regular moron baiter – this is an excellent deal.

“I don’t know why people think it’s such a big deal. I’ve used sex in exchange for getting all sorts of things, from hotel rooms to MOTs – what’s the big deal?

However, a spokesperson for the supermarket insisted that no deal would be forthcoming and that Hopkins must pay for her trolley full of groceries “with cash or card, like everyone else.”

They went on, “For some unfathomable reason, she seems to think that sexual intercourse with her has a value, and stranger still that she can ‘exchange’ it for other things.

“Don’t get me wrong, if a woman wants to get paid for having sex, then more power to her – but ideally that deal wouldn’t be struck at a supermarket till during the school run.”

One fellow shopper said he was shocked by Hopkins’ insistence on an exchange taking place.

They told us, “Her voice was raised as soon as she realised her initial offer wasn’t going to be accepted, and I’m sure I heard her say that she’d give someone a ‘blowy’ just for the fresh stuff.

“But honestly, I’ve seen what comes out of that woman’s mouth, and that’s reason enough to never want to put something in it.”

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