Tuesday 17 October 2017 by Pete Redfern

Brexiters outraged after Duchess of Cambridge photographed dancing with illegal immigrant


Duchess of Cambridge dances with illegal immigrant

Brexit voters across this green and pleasant land have expressed anger and disbelief after Kate Middleton was photographed dancing in public with an illegal immigrant.

Her Royal Highness was meeting with a number of children from various charities at an event in London yesterday when suddenly she took it upon herself to have a little dance with a nearby immigrant, reportedly called ‘Paddington’.

Former UKIP leader and melted waxwork Nigel Farage vented on his radio show to his five regular listeners, saying, “Now let me tell you, what I saw today made my blood boil, and there’s not a lot that makes me angry, as you know.

“By choosing to dance with this immigrant, who is rumoured to have illegally stowed away on a ship to get here from bongo-bongo land or somewhere, Kate Middleton has set a very bad example of what Brexit Britain’s attitude to illegals should look like.

“There is a real danger that many other illegal immigrants will view this as an open invitation to come over here. And from what I’ve heard, this ‘Paddington Bear’ hasn’t done a decent day’s work since he got here, the furry benefit scrounger. Disgraceful.”

He bleated on, “Personally, I don’t know what is becoming of our Royal family – first Prince Harry starts a relationship with someone who is not quite English, both in skin colour and heritage, and now this.”

Neither the Duchess of Cambridge nor Paddington Bear were available to respond, on account of them being busy actually contributing something positive to society instead of merely being the token racist on a phone-in radio station.

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