Monday 9 October 2017 by Lucas Wilde

Tax-funded $250,000 hissy fit ‘great value for money’ insist Trump supporters


Trump supporters happy with $250k publicity stunt

The hundreds of thousands of dollars spent on Mike Pence’s trip to pre-emptively flounce out of a football game was a fabulous use of taxpayers’ money, according to Trump supporters this morning.

Vice-President Mike Pence, formerly the face of every Viagra billboard you’ve ever seen, racked up a bill of around a quarter of a million dollars in transport costs, security services and associated sundries in order to attend a football game that he had no intention of watching at all.

“That’s what I call ‘draining the swamp’,” beamed Trump supporter, Chuck Williams.

“If there’s one thing that’s going to make America great again, it’s dropping a cool quarter million for a publicity stunt that is going to do nothing but stir the shit-pot ever faster.

“It chimes right in with our president’s statement last weekend that we all need to love each other. Storming out of a football game in response to a peaceful protest is definitely reflective of that sentiment.

“I mean, what else were we supposed to spend that money on? Puerto Ricans? Healthcare? Get real.”

A spokesperson for Pence, said, “It costs $42,936 an hour to fly Air Force 2, and the trip was two and a half hours each way, so that accounts for around $200,000.

“The other $50,000 comprises security, hotel costs and the additional police presence at the game.

“…actually it’s probably closer to $500,000 all-in but fuck it, it’s not like our support base is hot on maths.”

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