Friday 29 September 2017

Lions desperate to disassociate themselves from UKIP


New UKIP logo

Lions across the world have gathered together denounced their use in the new UKIP logo.

Just minutes after the comedy/political party unveiled their new logo, Lions everywhere said that nobody asked them for permission to use their likeness.

As one Lion told us, “We’re predatory animals; we think nothing of taking a life if it means a slightly easier afternoon for ourselves – but even we wouldn’t want to be associated with these complete shitehawks.

“What made UKIP think we were an appropriate choice for their logo? Most of us come from India and Africa – does no-one in UKIP do any research?

“Oh Christ, what are the other animals going to think if they see it?

“They should have gone with something quintessentially British, like a fat bulldog that was born cross-eyed due to inbreeding.”

A UKIP spokesperson said they were proud of the new logo, insisting it reflected UKIP’s values as the sort of party that likes to stay at home getting fat while the women do all the work.

They told us, “I understand that Lions are unhappy with the logo, but at least we used one of them looking suitably aghast after being told he’s going to appear on thousands and thousands of UKIP posters.”

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