Tuesday 26 September 2017 by Ed Harrison

Students wearing Jeremy Corbyn t-shirts adamant they’ve not joined a cult


Jeremy Corbyn t-shirt

The Labour Party conference in Brighton today saw students donning Jeremy Corbyn t-shirts deny rumours that they’ve joined a cult.

When questioned as to why he bought the shirt, Ryan – a privately educated Oxford student – said he was getting tired of wearing his Che Guevara t-shirt.

“I’ve never really known who Che Guevara was”, he stated, “but I know all about Corbyn after he beat the Tories in the 2017 election.”

After being reminded that Labour actually lost the last election, and that Che Guevara ordered the executions of thousands of his enemies, Ryan responded in a fit of panic, chanting “Oh Jeremy Corbyn” in an attempt to silence further questions.

Reporters also managed to catch up with Corbyn later on in the day to get his take on the new fashion. He stated that it “had always been his dream to someday be on a t-shirt”.

“It’s the only way to truly know if you’ve made it as a socialist,” he said.

“Now I can hold my head up high knowing that I’ll be remembered alongside the great Marxist revolutionaries of the twentieth-century. This is my greatest achievement since my victory at the 2017 general election where I defeated the Tories.”

After being reminded that Labour actually lost the election, reporters were again drowned out by the chants of “Oh Jeremy Corbyn”.

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