Monday 4 September 2017 by Neil Tollfree

Concern as President Trump tweets ‘Donnie play Nuke-nuke’


Donald Trump twitter

The White House tried to play down the latest tweet from the US President that simply read ‘Donnie play nuke-nuke.’

The tweet followed shortly after another tweet that read ‘Kim Dong-Un. Not Jong, Dong. That means winky,’ which served as the US response to provocative North Korean nuclear tests over the weekend.

“As far as we know, the President has no intention of launching any kind of nuclear attack,” said some guy who was serving as White House press secretary for this week.

“We think it just means he wants to play with his big red toy button and pretend he’s launching missiles against the biased fake news media.”

“Gee, I really hope that’s what it means.”

Relations between the US and North Korea have hit an all-time low after the President got jealous that Kim Jong-Un is allowed to play with missiles and he isn’t.

The tension began several months ago after Mr Trump tweeted ‘North Korea smells of pee-pee,’ to which the secretive nation’s official news channel responded by claiming that ‘Donald Trump runs like a girl.’

Whilst the situation regarding both Russia and North Korea remains fluid, it is understood that senior Republicans are trying to calm the president down by giving him a big bag of sweets and a new PlayStation with a copy of Call of Duty in space.

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