Thursday 24 August 2017 by Arabin Patson

UKIP propose to create racists-only train carriages


UKIP train carriages

In a possible attempt to seduce Labour voters, UKIP has declared it wants separate carriages on commuter trains and designated seats on buses where it would be illegal to record people spewing hateful bile.

The Eurosceptic party said it was high time someone provided a safe space for ranting bigots, xenophobic harridans and unhinged racists, and that proposals were likely to be put forward during this year’s party conference.

UKIP Transport spokesman Simon Williams said that the party accepted the move was controversial but that daily life for Britons who like shouting vile abuse at minorities was rapidly becoming untenable.

He went on, “How many times have decent hardworking honest Englishmen seen their lives ruined just because they wished to tell some African gentleman where he should actually reside?

“How often have we seen PC busybodies take intrusive videos of fine British lasses giving their informed views on Islam and then post these films on various social media platforms?

“Our members live in fear that their witty observations on multiculturalism and linguistics will result in a knock on the door from the police because of so-called evidence that they spat on terrified children. Some of our supporters barely leave the house any more!”

During a recent press conference, the Conservatives were asked what was the party’s stance on segregated areas on trains but failed to provide an answer.

The spokesman explained that party members didn’t really take public transport but he could ask some of their limo drivers what they thought, if that would help.

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