Friday 18 August 2017

‘Study what Grand Moff Tarkin did to Alderaan, no more radical rebel alliance for 35 years’ tweets Donald Trump


Donald Trump tweets about Grand Moff Tarkin

Donald Trump has urged his supporters to study the techniques of Grand Moff Tarkin, claiming they show the best way to defeat radical Islamic terrorists.

Trump tweeted, “Study what Grand Moff Tarkin did to Alderaan when rebels were caught – no more radical rebel alliance terrorism for 35 years!”

Supporters of the president have revelled in the suggestion that blowing entire planets off the map is the way to defeat ISIS, seemingly unaware that ISIS is on the same planet as themselves.

Trump clarified his position, telling reporters, “We must learn our lessons from history, and if we know anything, it’s that Grand Moff Tarkin effectively ended the violent rebellion by destroying Alderaan – so such techniques might seem extreme, but they clearly work.

“The liberal left claim I’m using debunked facts to make my argument, but that is just fake news. You can go and watch the footage yourself if you want to. It’s right there on the Internet available to stream for a reasonable price as I understand.

“Look, we must try some new things to beat ISIS, these are bad people,  very bad people, and if we can’t learn some new ideas from the history books, then what hope do we have.

“Well, I say history books, I’m more of a documentary guy, and A New Hope is up there with the best of them.”

White House officials are currently scouring the West Wing DVD collection in case he finds a Game of Thrones box set and uses it as further justification for building his wall.

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