Wednesday 16 August 2017

Donald Trump says Rebel Alliance must also take blame for violence as Death Star had all the required permits


Death Star had proper permits insists Donald Trump

Donald Trump has insisted the Rebel Alliance must take their share of the blame for the violence in the Star Wars universe after revealing the Empire had all the necessary permits to gather at the Death Star.

Speaking to reporters to clarify his position on the violent battles fought between the two sides, Trump explained that the fake news media are ignoring all the good people inside in the Empire.

“I don’t see anyone talking about the bad people inside the Rebel Alliance charging at the Death Star even though it had all the necessary paperwork in place and was allowed to be there.

“The Empire followed the rules, and went about its business within the rule of law, is that so wrong? Are we criticising people for obeying the law now?

“If we’re going to blow up Death Stars just because they’re symbols of oppression, what next? The Sith Temple on Korriban?”

Trump also went on to deny that he is racist, insisting that his favourite member of the Empire is entirely black.

“No-one has done more to bring harmony to the universe than me, nobody,” he went on.

“You all agree with me, and even if you don’t agree with me, you definitely agree with me that there was violence on both sides, that’s all I’m saying.

“Remember, with our combined strength, we can end this destructive conflict and bring order to the galaxy.”

Trump supporters have welcomed the clarification of the President’s position, especially in light of his previous pre-prepared statement that appeared to condemn the Empire.

Trump voter Chuck Williams told us, “Obviously what he said about the Empire the day before was written by the Rebel Alliance libtard cucks inside his administration.

“But thankfully the power of the dark side is strong within Trump, as you will all come to realise, in time.”

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