Thursday 10 August 2017 by Tom Moore

Donald Trump tells Kim Jung-un ‘bend the knee or be burnt alive’


Donald Trump to bend the knee

The White House has been forced to deny allegations that President Trump watches too much Game of Thrones after referring to himself as the ‘mother of dragons’ in a press conference yesterday.

Officials started becoming increasingly concerned on Monday evening after Trump began stomping around the White House shouting ‘Kim Jung-un, bend the knee or be burnt alive’.

Rumours in Washington even suggest the real reason behind former White House communications director, Anthony Scaramucci’s, sacking was his refusal to refer to President Trump by his new moniker.

An insider told us, “President Trump had some pretty strong intel that North Korea was stockpiling a very substantial arsenal of wildfire. He called a meeting at the Pentagon where he told us he would destroy those who wronged him, lay waste to armies and burn cities to the ground.

“He then asked Mooch if he would introduce him as the ‘mother of dragons’ at the next press conference, but Mooch said that his father had pledged allegiance to Robert Baratheon. We knew it was all over for him then.”

According to our sources, Trump’s obsession with Game of Thrones dates back to the first few weeks of his inauguration when he released a secret memo asking officials not to use the term ‘White Walkers’ in any of their communications.

This white washing of the White Walkers angered some in the Trump camp who have been warning of the impending threat from the other side of the Wall for decades.

The rumours also suggest he considered buying an army of unsullied but his recent comments on transgender people in the military mean he’s unlikely to follow through with his plans.

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