Wednesday 2 August 2017

Leave voter happy to see family member lose job after Brexit as long as it’s his nephew Brian


Leave voter happy for nephew to lose job

Leave voter Simon Williams has told us that his nephew Brian is very much ‘up himself’ and if Brexit means he loses his job then he couldn’t be happier.

After YouGov published the results of a survey which said that over half of Leave voters over 65 would be happy for a family member to lose their job as long as we leave the EU, Williams said it probably means lots of people are related to someone like Brian.

The 70-year-old told us, “Honestly, that smug twat could really do with being knocked down a peg or two, endlessly going on about his job in ‘computers’ – so if Brexit means he loses his job then I don’t see how that could possibly be a negative?

“How can ‘computers’ be a job anyway. It’s ridiculous. No man in his late thirties should be doing that.

“To be honest, if it had guaranteed him being out of work then I might even have been willing to vote remain. Maybe”

His nephew Brian told us, “He told you I work in ‘computers’? Look, I manage a team of developers who create independent computer games across all the major platforms. This company employs hundreds of people and generates millions of pounds for the British economy. Buy hey, my uncle hates the people who run the ‘paki shop’, so there’s that.”

Other voters have said the findings of the YouGov survey might be a little flawed.

Sharon Davidson told us, “I just think that judging whether Brexit was a good idea, or not, purely based on how much people hate their relatives is a flawed methodology.

“Personally, I think leaving the EU is shortsighted and will have significant negative economic and social effect for at least a generation – but if it means my bitch of a sister-in-law joins the dole queue, sign me up.”

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