Wednesday 26 July 2017 by Lucas Wilde

New electric Mini actually a giant Scalextric car


Electric Mini

BMW is releasing a car that you will drive by squeezing a trigger and hoping for the best.

The car giant yesterday announced that this would be the first fully electric version of the car.

“It’s going to be great fun,” confirmed Simon Williams, head of innovation.

“All you have to do is sit in the driver’s seat and hold down a trigger on a little gun; only not so hard that your car spins off the road and kills you on a light bend.

“It’s going to save everybody an absolute fortune in petrol; although it might be a bit of a ball-ache to dig up the roads to put those slots in for the cars.

“We’ve thought this through to the extent we all agree it will be cool to commute to work using a gun.”

Police officer, Jay Cooper, said, “I have mixed feelings about this.

“On the one hand, Scalextric has always been amazing, but on the other hand, we are forecasting around 350 accidents in the first month of the car’s release.

“So, swings and roundabouts.”

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