Monday 17 July 2017 by Lucas Wilde

Ten-year colleagues still quite happy not knowing each other’s names


colleagues call each other 'mate'

Two people who have worked together for ten years still refer to each other solely as “mate”.

Simon Williams and Jay Cooper work in separate departments of the head office of Bastard & Sons, and see each other only in the kitchen, in the car park and at the Christmas party.

“I know he has a wife and he has a passing interest in football,” confirmed Simon Williams.

“I also have a wife and a passing interest in football, and frankly that’s all I need in order to carry off a conversation until the coffee machine has finished doing its thing.

“I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know my name either, and I’m fine with that. I have enough friends. Two is enough.”

Jay Cooper said, “Is it Keith? I want to say it’s Keith… is anyone still called Keith?

“He seems nice enough though. We had a beer together at the Christmas party while our wives got to know each other.

“I know his wife is called Stephanie because my wife told me. That’s about all I know about him.”

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