Friday 30 June 2017 by GlockTheRock

George Osborne reveals new role as the next Doctor


George Osborne The Doctor

George Osborne has revealed his seventh job, this time as the new incarnation of The Doctor.

Osborne insisted his other six jobs left plenty of time for him to battle evil across time and space on prime time Saturday television.

He told reporters, “Time is money you know, and if you want more of the latter, how better than by being a master of the former?

“I am confident I can bring my unique skill set to the role, particularly when it comes to the political side of the doctor’s life. We hear so little about what he thinks of fiscal responsibility.

“No-one ever talks about the cost of fighting the Cybermen, and whether it’s something really worth increasing the budget deficit for.

“Should the taxpayer really be picking up the bill, or should the Doctor stay at home and see how it all pans out?”

Doctor Who fan Simon Williams told us of his dismay at the announcement.

“I’ve been watching this show since the 70’s, and I can honestly say, hand on heart, this is the first time I’ve wanted the Daleks to win.”

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