Wednesday 21 June 2017 by Neil Tollfree

Daniel Day-Lewis quits acting after failing to win lead role in Captain Underpants movie


Captain underpants Daniel Day Lewis

Three-time Oscar winner Daniel Day-Lewis has announced that he is retiring from acting after failing to secure a role in Captain Underpants, a new children’s film due out in July.

Mr Day-Lewis had been determined to play a superhero ever since missing out on being a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle in the nineties.

“Daniel has spent the last four years wearing nothing but his underpants and a cloak, in preparation for the role,” said a spokesperson for the actor.

“He has immersed himself in the character of the Captain, and feels like he understands better than anyone the nature of a man who wears underpants and fights crime, and to see the part go to someone else is a huge insult.”

The role of Captain Underpants was played by Ed Helms and representatives for Mr Day-Lewis have denied that when he found out, he stripped to his underpants and confronted Mr Helms with the words – ‘Helms, you f**k, you’re shit at wearing underpants. Look at me, look at me in my pants’.

Mr Day-Lewis will begin a new career as manager of a cake shop in Bridlington and it is understood that the only thing that could tempt him back to the movie business is if he could play Bananaman in any future big-screen venture.

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