Wednesday 7 June 2017 by Neil Tollfree

Donald Trump appoints this month’s FBI director


Donald Trump appoints new head of FBI

Comedy President of the United States Donald Trump has appointed Christopher Wray lead the FBI for the next month or so.

Mr Wray is said to be exactly the sort of person who can lead the FBI into mid to late summer.

“It is a tremendous honour for me to take charge at the FBI and I look forward to exercising my duty until the President decides to fire me for not swearing a blood oath to him, beating him at PlayStation, or launching a legitimate investigation into just what the hell he thinks he’s doing.

“I have a long trip planned for the holidays and, as it stands, I see know real reason to cancel that.”

The ‘President’ is said to have come to the decision that Mr Wray is the man to lead the FBI after noticing that he had a very today haircut.

“I love this guy, this guy is definitely my guy for leading the Feds and there is no way, and I mean absolutely not, that I’m going to have a huge, huge tantrum and fire him for at least two or three months.”

Although there is confidence at the White House that Mr Wray will not be fired anytime soon, they have lined up a potential replacement for the Christmas period and another who is free between February and April next year.

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