Thursday 20 April 2017 by Tommy Wolder

Don’t mention the Brexit, says Jeremy Corbyn, I mentioned it once but I think I got away with it


Jeremy Corbyn Brexit election 2017

Jeremy Corbyn accidentally mentioned Brexit yesterday, but is confident that he got away with it without anyone noticing.

When laying out the issues on which Labour intends to fight the election, Mr Corbyn mentioned the NHS, low wages, and climate change but then appeared to get a little flustered and stammered – ‘Brexit is a thing…that is happening.’

“There are some people who think of themselves as European, so whatever you do, don’t mention the Brexit,” said Mr Corbyn afterwards, clarifying his position to supporters.

“I mentioned it once, but I think I got away with it.”

“Obviously, we could stand a real chance in this election if we fought it on an anti-Brexit platform, but we would much rather continue our policy of ambivalence towards Brexit that got us so strongly through the referendum last year.”

It would appear that Labour will continue its policy of completely ignoring anything to do Brexit as there as many different opinions regarding the topic as there are members of the party itself.

Mr Corbyn revealed his secret plan to deal with questions about Brexit.

“It’s to call Sir Phillip Green a big shit, and run away.

“If necessary, slap your Spanish waiter around his head and then blame your wife.”

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