Wednesday 5 April 2017 by Davywavy

Human race finally united as everyone agrees that dinosaurs are fantastic


Dinosaurs are brilliant

The only thing which unites humanity is thinking dinosaurs are great, according to experts today.

Of all the many and varied beliefs and philosophies which the infinite creativity of the human mind has conjured forth, the only one which has not caused violent conflict is the argument over which dinosaur is the best, scientists have confirmed.

“Some people think that T. Rex is best, while others reckon that Brontosaurus is superior. And some people really like Dimetrodon, which is just plain weird,” said Dinosaurologist Dr Simon Williams.

“But nobody has ever started shooting over it.”

Children appear to be born with an awe-inspired love of Dinosaurs, which is kept throughout their lives as other beliefs are worn away by everyday reality.

The success of Jurassic World is being held up as proof that people will put themselves through any torture for a fix of those wonderful dinosaurs.

“People have killed each other for, variously, disagreeing over beard length, preferring market economics to command economics, the shape of the earth, and whether you get a bunch of virgins or get reincarnated as a badger when you die,” he told us.

“Amongst plenty of others.

“Nobody has ever been killed for looking at a bloody great lizard skeleton and going ‘Cooool’. In fact, when you do that everyone wants to join in.

“Dinosaurs. They bring people together. That’s science, that is.”

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