Monday 6 March 2017 by Tom Sharpe

Researchers confirm bad behaviour by small number of people definitely representative of entire group


Large group

In an unpredictable turn of events, a small number of people have ruined it for the rest of the group.

Never in the history of groups has anyone ever given the rest a bad name by taking things a bit too far.

Group leaders Simon Williams and Gary Matthews who, despite leading opposing groups, both agreed that each other’s group had always operated with complete rationality and moderation.

They were also both shocked that minority offshoots of their groups had started taking more extreme measures in their name.

“None of us saw this coming,” Simon explained.

“Groups have always operated a ‘hive mentality’ where every single person strives for exactly the same goal.

“No one ever breaks away and tries to escalate things to a whole new level of unreasonable fuckery.”

Gary seemed equally perplexed by the new phenomenon that has suddenly started sweeping through groups of all types and sizes.

“What is the world coming to when people can suddenly focus on what a small, insignificant band of extremist twats is doing, and then blame their actions on the entire group the extremist ‘claims’ to be a part of?”

A member of the public that we asked to comment, agreed that “once an extremist has claimed their actions were committed in the name of a group that you already hold a prejudice toward, that that group are in fact totally responsible for those actions.”

That opinion is, of course, representative of the rest of the public.

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