Wednesday 1 February 2017 by Neil Tollfree

Aeroplanes reliant on magic to fly


aeroplane magic

The scientific world has been stunned by revelations that the principles of aeronautics are a hoax and aeroplanes stay in the air simply by using good old fashioned magic.

“It’s going to change the way we think about everything,” said aeronautical expert Professor Simon Williams

For the past century, it has been thought that aircraft’s ability to fly is due to the shape of their wings forcing a greater air pressure along the bottom of the wing and thus generating the lift required to keep the craft in the air.

“Thrust, lift, and whatnot,” continued Professor Williams.

“It appears that it’s complete and utter twaddle and the whole thing’s done with magic.

“It makes sense when you think about it. I mean, forcing air to go faster over the top of a wing to create less pressure? It simply doesn’t make sense.”

It is understood that the concepts of basic aeronautics were invented in the early twentieth century by scientists who wanted to impress girls and feel like big men.

“Well, I’m just glad the truth is finally out there,” said wizard David Blaine.

“I mean, it’s not right, not really. We in the magic community, we’ve known the truth about planes for years, but if you try and tell anyone that planes fly because of magic you’re branded a nutball.

“I just wish Paul Daniels was still alive to see this.”

It is expected that this news will open the floodgates for revelations that all sorts of everyday objects such as combs, flat screen TVs, and Ant and Dec are all entirely reliant on magic to function correctly.

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: