Friday 27 January 2017

ISIS thank Lee Hurst for innovative ‘baby strapped to time bomb’ idea


ISIS Lee Hurst

ISIS have thanked 90s comedian Lee Hurst for his ‘out of the box’ thinking on incendiary devices, admitting they have become a bit bored with straight forward suicide missions.

Hurst took to Twitter yesterday to outline steps he would take if ISIS were to escalate their war of terror to include babies strapped to time bombs, and ISIS have admitted that his idea has a certain degree of merit.

In a release via Al Jazeera, a spokesperson for the terrorist group said, “Strapping a baby to a bomb does sound like the sort of thing we would do, so I don’t know why we haven’t done it yet.

“I think it would have precisely the impact we’re looking for if we could make it work, and I think we could, easily, apart from all of the obvious practicalities that make it a terrible idea.

“But watch this space. We are going to call it the Lee Hurst device, and in years to come, you will not be able to hear the cries of a baby without wondering if it has been strapped to a time bomb by a terrorist who just needs a good old-fashioned torturing.

“And if you are lucky enough to catch us before it goes off, we will NEVER tell you where the bomb is – even if you torture us with endless repeats of They Think It’s All Over.

“That’s how committed we are. We’ll even sit through the David Gower and Steve Davis one.”

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