Monday 23 January 2017 by Neil Tollfree

Man who didn’t like La La Land shunned by society


La La Land

A man who remained steadfastly unmoved by Hollywood hit La La Land is being shunned friends, family and society as a whole.

Simon Williams, of Chelmsford, Essex, took to Facebook to announce his controversial opinion.

“Just saw La La Land,” he posted.

“Not sure what the fuss is about if I’m honest, just a load of people singing and dancing.”

Immediately after the post appeared, his wife took the children, left Mr Williams, and is seeking a divorce.

“You can’t spend your life with someone who didn’t like La La Land; it’s inhuman.”

The bank at which Mr Williams worked for the past 15 years has terminated his employment with immediate effect.

“We do not want to be associated with the sort of person who doesn’t like La La Land,” said a spokesperson for the bank.

“It makes us look like a pack of bastards, and speaking as a banker; we get enough of that already.”

His parents have asked him to stop using the family name of Williams.

“I can’t imagine he will though, I mean the sort of tosser who doesn’t like La La Land isn’t likely to honour a simple wish to abandon his family name.”

It is understood that Parliament is planning new legislation that will put people who don’t like La La Land on the same level as paedophiles, and Mr Williams can then expect to go to prison for a long time.

It is understood that Mr Williams also didn’t like I, Daniel Blake either.

The shit.

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