Thursday 22 December 2016 by Iain Closs

Rogue One release sees Peter Cushing declared fit for work by DWP


Peter Cushing fit for work

Legendary screen actor Peter Cushing who starred as Grand Moff Tarkin in Star Wars Episode IV – A New Hope was today informed that he has been declared fit for work by the Department of Works and Pensions, despite dying in 1994.

A Statement from the DWP explained that “Peter Cushing is a fine example to all Britons out there with a long and distinguished work history, however after 20 years not working and apparently being dead we were delighted to see him well enough to appears in Rogue One – A star wars story.

“We’re not sure how or why this happened, but that does not concern us – what’s important is that he’s out there earning a crust at 103 years of age, so we had no choice but to declare him fit for work.”

When pushed by journalists as to how this can happen a DWP spokesman simply replied, “I dunno, space wizards maybe?”

Fans all over the world have reacted with excitement that Peter may be working to bring back some of his most-beloved characters from his long career, including Doctor Van Helsing in Horror of Dracula and Sherlock Holmes in Hound of the Baskervilles.

Meanwhile, Doctor Who fans have also asked for his return as the Doctor with one fan quoted as saying “well he looks younger than Peter Capaldi, so that’s a good start”.

The DWP are also looking into the Star Wars character Darth Vader for pension fraud, with six actors claiming to have played the part despite him only ever having one voice.

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