Monday 19 December 2016

Katie Hopkins rushed to hospital after choking on apology to Muslim family


Katie Hopkins

Katie Hopkins has been hospitalised after being forced to apologise to a Muslim family she had claimed were extremists.

Hopkins was legally obliged to offer the apology for her Daily Mail column, and despite trying to send it out at 2 am when no-one would be reading her Twitter feed, Hopkins choked on the word ‘apology’ as it was typed into Twitter.

Doctors at the local hospital claim Hopkins is making a good recovery after the choking incident, but that it looked bad when she arrived.

A hospital spokesperson explained, “Thankfully she was treated by a couple of immigrant doctors and nurses who she was able to abuse and accuse of harbouring terrorists, and she gained a lot of strength from that.”

Hopkins has been put on an unusual treatment plan.

One doctor told us, “She’s rewriting the medical text book, we always thought bile served no purpose beyond helping us to digest food.

“But for Katie it brings strength. It’s like Popeye and spinach. The more bile she has, the stronger she becomes.

“We’ve spent the night pouring bile down her throat, and walking immigrant NHS staff past her bed – and thankfully this morning, she’s basically a large sack of wide-awake angry bile, and she’s ready to be discharged.”

“Yes, she’s back to normal. Sorry.”

I think, therefore I am (not a Daily Mail reader)

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