Sunday 11 December 2016 by Gary Stanton

‘Just about managing’ defined as those with a grand to spend on leather trousers


Theresa May leather trousers

Britons are pissing their hard-earned cash up the wall on leather kecks, according to reports.

The news comes as prime minister Theresa May received five pounds change from a grand in a bid to look like the lead singer of Aerosmith.

In a speech earlier, May defined the ‘just about managing’ as those with a monthly disposable income of one thousand pounds and a store card with Top Shop.

Much like her predecessor, David Cameron, Mrs May said she likes nothing more than to spend her leisure time by slipping into a dead animal.

The trousers, retailing at £995 in case you’d fucking forgotten, are said to be part of an outfit that consists of a long leather coat and the cap of an Einsatzgruppenführer.

Fashion expert, Simon Williams, said:

“These exceedingly figure-hugging pants are now the must-have Christmas item for everyone with a spare grand lying around and a desire to look like mutton dressed as lamb.

“Talk about the squeezed middle.”

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: