Wednesday 23 November 2016

Brexiter refusing to believe nation will be £122bn worse off until it’s written on a bus


Government finances £122bn worse off

Brexiter Simon Williams has insisted the Chancellor’s claim that government finances are £122bn worse off post-Brexit is pure scaremongering, and will continue to believe that is the case until he sees it written on a bus.

Williams said that today’s Autumn statement by Chancellor Philip Hammond, which highlighted the £122bn figure, is based on nothing more than research and expert opinion, and as such should be discarded without a moment’s thought.

He went on, “Everyone knows that financial facts are written on buses, it’s the British way of doing things.

“You can say whatever you like with your so-called reports, analysis and experts – until I see it driving down the motorway in two foot high letters I won’t believe a word of it.

“Everyone knows you can make up a report, but you can’t make up an entire bus!

“If these figures were true, and the economy really is going to be this much worse after Brexit, then obviously they would have put it on a bus. It’s how the British electorate expects to be told about the economy, dumbass.

“Show me a bus that says we’ll be £122bn a year worse off after a hard Brexit, and then maybe we’ll talk – but until then, you and your leaked reports can just piss off.”

Williams went on to explain that Brexit is the best thing that has ever happened to the country, before heading to the Post Office to buy some Euros for a stag do he’s about to attend.

Brexit means Clusterf*ck – get the t-shirt here!

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