Wednesday 16 November 2016 by Alex Marsh

Join us in celebrating International Day of Tolerance or just fuck off, say organisers


swearing fingers

The United Nations has slammed people who do not plan to observe Wednesday’s International Day of Tolerance, calling them ‘divisive, pig-shit-for-brains idiots who should just fuck off.’

“We want the Tolerance Day to be an inclusive celebration,” explained a spokesman.

“We want it to be characterised by mutual respect and an understanding of each others’ cultures.

“But, to be honest, there are so many twats around these days.

“We’re trying to organise something based around the spirit of Gandhi and Nelson Mandela and all those sorts of people. But every time round there are countries and individuals who try to ruin it for the rest.

“We’ve been pretty patient over the years,” he added. “But this time we’re taking a zero tol… well, that is to say that we’re taking a pretty dim view.”

The spokesman insisted that the International Day would be a success.

“Wednesday November 16th will see happy-clappy events taking place all around the globe,” he said.

“And then we will be passing our annual strongly-worded resolution saying that people and countries should be nice to one another.

“If anybody doesn’t like that, then they can stick it up their arse.”

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