Wednesday 2 November 2016 by Davywavy

Bill Clinton secretly hoping Hillary gets 20 years


Bill Clinton hoping Hillary goes to prison for 20 years

Bill Clinton is quietly hoping Hillary gets sent down for a good long time, according to reports.

The former President is understood to have recently binged watched two seasons of Orange Is The New Black and got a bit hot under the collar at the thought of paying regular visits to a women’s prison.

Hillary is under investigation by the FBI for losing tens of thousands fewer emails than George W Bush, leading to her husband hoping that she gets locked up before she thinks to read his emails and check his browser history.

According to aides, Bill is ‘really getting into the idea’ of walking around an all-female penitentiary wearing mirrorshades while jangling his keys and waving a baton around, and has bought a pack of toothpicks to chew on while he does so.

However, he was ‘really disappointed’ to learn that conjugal visits are required to be with his actual wife.

Speaking to friends, Clinton said, “Who’d have thought it would be me visiting Hillary in jail? I always thought it’d be the other way round.

“It’s kinda ironic that we’re looking at Hillary going down for twenty years seeing as she hasn’t, uh…” before breaking off sharply when he noticed our reporter could overhear.

When asked how he’d cope without his beloved First Lady at home, Clinton smiled and replied “Well, uh, when the cat’s away, uh-huh. Yup.”

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