Tuesday 18 October 2016 by Neil Tollfree

UKIP to turn to the saxophone guy from Lost Boys for their new leader


UKIP leader

It has been revealed that UKIP has reached out to the saxophone guy from the movie Lost Boys to be their new leader.

“It’s been a tricky few months,” said a UKIP insider.

“Obviously, Nigel quit as leader to go to the pub, he was replaced by that lady whose name I forget. She then left very quickly after meeting UKIP supporters, and now the favourite to take over has stropped off because he was duffed up in a car park.

“It’s time to restore a bit of credibility to UKIP, and we think the Lost Boys saxophone guy is the man to do that.”

The appointment seems to be finding favour amongst UKIP supporters.

“Yeah, I like him. He looks angry about stuff,” said Simon Williams, a UKIP supporter and bicycle seat sniffer from Colchester.

“You know, fierce. He plays the saxophone like someone who’s tired of unchecked immigration and the liberal elite.

“He’ll be really good, I think.”

However, Lost Boys saxophone guy wasn’t UKIP’s first choice for the leadership.

“No, we’d originally wanted the vibrator-stuck-up-the-bum student, or the man from Hull who dresses up as Batman and chases killer clowns,” continued the insider.

“But they’re a little out of our league.”

There are currently witterings below - why not add your own?

Previous post:

Next post: