Monday 17 October 2016 by Davywavy

Scientists confirm breeding population of Hipsters established in the North


Hipsters found in the north

A breeding pair of Hipsters has been found north of Islington for the first time, according to an article published in Nature magazine.

The authors suggest the discovery of the pair outside their normal North London range may be evidence of climate change, population pressures, or maybe just people beyond Watford getting a bit softer.

Describing the discovery as ‘very exciting’, ecologists say they only stumbled on the pair when they spotted a 19th-century red-brick terrace house in the North without a ‘Vote UKIP’ poster in the window.

Closer investigation revealed the den contained a home-brew beer set, a pot of moustache wax and an occasional table made out of driftwood.

To watch the pair, naturalists have set up a hide opposite their artisan fudge boutique in Barnsley.

“The hipsters have created their bower between a branch of Spamland and a shop called ‘World of £1 Black Pudding’,” we were told.

“It’s the last place we would have expected to find them, but they seem to be thriving despite a challenging environment.

“Possibly the male plumage of bushy beard, braces and pipe makes other inhabitants think he’s just a plumber called Dave or something. We haven’t seen physical adaptation like this since we discovered the cuckoo.”

The precise location of the Hipster lair is a closely guarded secret, and a 24-hour watch is being kept in order to prevent Hipster-spotting twitchers disturbing the pair and the locals from stealing their young.

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