Monday 10 October 2016 by Rob Hearn

Owen Smith sent to the Upside Down in Labour reshuffle


Labour reshuffle upside down

Jeremy Corbyn has awarded his former leadership rival Owen Smith a shadow cabinet post in the Upside Down, it has emerged.

Smith, who lost the recent leadership election to Corbyn by a record margin, is reportedly relieved to have been given a senior post after a bitterly fought battle over the smoking remnants of the Labour movement.

“I am thrilled that Jeremy has let bygones be bygones and given me this important role in the shadow cabinet,” Smith said in a statement.

“The Upside Down is a challenging department but I plan to survive for as long as I can.”

The Upside Down, which was brought to public attention in the 2016 Netflix mini-series Stranger Things, is a parallel spatial dimension that exists alongside our own and is accessible via a portal in a mysterious government building.

It is believed that Corbyn is seeking to court voters in the Upside Down, though the latest census data indicates that the region has just one resident – a man-eating monster whose eligibility to vote is uncertain.

Smith will relocate with his family to the Upside Down and only return to this dimension occasionally for essential parliamentary business.

It is thought that he will spend much of his time running away from the monster, though Corbyn is reportedly happy for him to spend up to 60 percent of his time hiding.

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