Tuesday 27 September 2016

Water on Jupiter’s moon Europa already better than in most Spanish hotels


Europa moon has water

NASA has announced that water on Jupiter’s moon Europa is already of a better quality than you’d get from a tap in any Spanish hotel.

Analysis from the Hubble telescope showed that the plumes of water leaving the surface of the moon contain absolutely no traces of human excrement.

A NASA spokesperson said, “This is a significant discovery.  The water we’ve found has been floating around space for millions of years on what might be a dead rock, yet it contains not a drop of shit or piss from a European sewage works.

“Someone actually had a glass of water from a Spanish villa complex – as a comparison – but it got labelled incorrectly, and for the briefest moment we thought we’d discovered poo monsters on Europa.  We have a laugh about that now.”

The discovery of clean-ish water on Europa is set to save space exploration missions billions of dollars on future projects.

“We had expected to invest billions in water filtration systems for future space programmes,” continued the spokesperson.

“But the simple fact is that if an astronaut can survive a fortnight in Benidorm without catching dysentery, then their guts can take anything the water from Europa has to offer.”

Comparisons between the quality of water on Europa and that found in a so-called civilised European country have been called unfair by some scientists.

An unnamed NASA laboratory technician told us, “Yes, it’s really not fair to compare the two of them.

“One is a desolate inhospitable place best studied from afar where only the truly brave few will ever dare to venture, whilst the other one is in space.”

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