Tuesday 20 September 2016 by Davywavy

‘No brown M&Ms’, insists Trump


Trump bans brown M&Ms

Donald Trump is insisting on a bowl of M&Ms ‘with all the brown ones removed’, we can report.

His new contract rider insists that a that a bowl of the popular sweet be placed in his dressing room, but the contents had to be ‘aggressively vetted’ to ensure no brown ones were left in the mix.

Trump spokesman John Miller told us that the removal of brown M&Ms was to show the venue was taking security issues seriously and what happened to them after they were gone was ‘no concern’ of the Presidential hopeful.

“The problem with bowls of M&Ms is that if even a few of them are brown they ruin the whole bowl,” he told us.

“A lot of people are saying this means I don’t like brown M&Ms but that’s not true,” he went on to say.

“I could have picked any colour. Blue. Yellow. It’s a total coincidence that it’s the brown ones I want removing, and preferably put in the dustbin or fed to animals.”

When asked, Trump confirmed his favourite colour confectionary was orange, but declined to say why.

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