Sunday 11 September 2016 by Neil Tollfree

Last Night of the Proms sees ‘and f*ck the French’ line added to National Anthem


Last night of the proms

There were mixed reactions to the controversial addition of the line ‘and f**k the French’ to the traditional rousing climax of God Save The Queen during the Last Night of the Proms.

“Ruddy marvellous,” said Brigadier Sir Simon Williams III, a leading campaigner to bring back slavery and owner of three-quarters of Wiltshire.

“Now that we’ve finally cut ourselves off from that dreadful collection of garlic-eating, beret-wearing, surrender-happy sex-maniacs, I think that it’s only proper that our National Anthem should reflect it.”

The line was added at the end of the first verse of God Save The Queen, so that it now reads ‘Long live our noble Queen, and f**k the French,’ instead of the traditional ‘Long live our noble Queen, God save the Queen.’

“I’m not really sure,” said beardy metropolitan elite-type Jeremy Ponce.

“It sounds a little offensive to me, but I suppose the problem with me is that I’m out of touch with how normal people think.”

However, there was some negative reaction from normal people as well.

“Not happy, if I’m honest,” said normal person Eleanor Gay

“There was nothing about having a go at the Germans.

“Rubbish.”

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