Tuesday 6 September 2016 by Lucas Wilde

Keith Vaz to resign in order to spend more time with his male escorts


Keith Vaz mae escorts

Labour MP Keith Vaz is to step down from the Home Affairs Select Committee to fully focus on his ring of rent boys.

The hugely popular politician is being forced to consider his position following allegations in the Sunday Mirror that he could often be found snorting cocaine and bumming with male prostitutes of an evening.

“It is a real stress on our relationship,” said Simon Williams, one of Mr Vaz’s favourite escorts.

“We hardly ever get to see him during the busier months, and while it’s always exciting when he does come round and we give him first dibs on the gak, it would be lovely to have him around more often.

“There are some shelves that need putting up; the shed needs clearing out and young Tarquin needs a right good seeing to.”

A spokesperson for Mr Vaz, “Keith feels he has represented his constituents in the manner they would desire.

“But that’s only because Keith reckons most of his constituents are also into cocaine and bumming.”

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