Monday 5 September 2016 by Gary Stanton

Met Police seeking new leads over Great Fire of London


Pudding Lane Great Fire of London

The Metropolitan Police are appealing for fresh information regarding the Great Fire of London, it has emerged.

Eagle-eyed sleuths have noticed discrepancies in the original accounts of the fire, which was widely blamed on French immigrants.

The original police reports found that ‘fire definitely played a role’ in the destruction of over seventy thousand homes and a Greggs bakery on Pudding Lane.

However, The Met have since been accused of a ‘catalogue of failures’ over the incident, such as a ‘lynchmob mentality’ and of not really existing in their current form.

The advice given to the public at the time was deemed wholly inadequate and amounted to ‘pour on water’ and ‘fetch the engine’.

Police plan to stage a Crimewatch Reconstruction of the night in question with new presenter, Jeremy Vine, dressed as Samuel Pepys in the hope of jogging someone’s memory.

Vine said, “This was probably a sickening act of arson and an attack on the heart of London itself.

“If anyone has any information regarding this historic event that they are keeping to themselves for whatever reason, they can talk in confidence to one of our team.

Meanwhile, descendants of the victims blame a police cover-up, insisting four hundred years is a long time to wait for justice.

Crimewatch fan and part-time historian, Simon Williams, said, “Normally, it only takes them this long to solve a crime if the victims are black.”

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